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Love Reconciled

Learning to Live Together -- In Love, Work and Play

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Genuine Love Matters

America is changing the way we love. Interracial dating and marriages are booming in this country. It was over 50 years ago on June 12, 1967 that the U.S. Supreme Court knocked down a Virginia statute barring whites from marrying nonwhites. The decision also overturned similar bans in 15 other states. Since the landmark case Loving vs. Virginia ruling, interracial marriages have skyrocketed.

The World is Changing
Everyday folk, celebrities, politicians, dignitaries and royalty are marrying who they love regardless of what others say or think. In 1970 the census reported 65,000 interracial marriages.  In 2007 interracial marriages had grown to over 2,669,558 in the United States.  Today, 1 out of 10 married people, or around 11 million, which is 17%, are married to someone of a different race than themselves.  Everyone has an opinion on interracial relationships. But at the end of the day what really matters is what the two individuals feel and think about each other.

Are Interracial Unions Harder?
Do interracial marriages have it harder than same-race relationships? It depends on where they live and whom they surround themselves with. It also depends on their support system of family, friends and co-workers. Do individuals forget who they are in a mixed-race union? Not unless they chose to take on the identity and culture of the other person. Relationships can be difficult regardless of the makeup of the individuals, but there is something unique about loving someone different. It can open up a new world culturally, mentally and emotionally.  What has made it easier for Char and I, is that from the beginning we decided it was us against the world, which included in-laws and outlaws.

Within American society we have racial subcultures. There are Black, Asian, Latin, Anglo and other subcultures. If you marry an American of a different race, you still have to deal with their culture. Other subcultures may have their own stereotypes, views, customs, language and their environment consist of people that look and act similar to them. 

When you enter into a relationship with someone you usually also enter into a relationship with their family and culture.  Unfortunately, their family and culture may reject you. If that happens, a decision needs to be made as a couple to stay connected or detach yourselves in order to preserve the relationship. However, do not think that everyone staring is disapproving of the mixed union. Some are maybe staring because they feel you are a beautiful couple, your kids are cute, or you remind them of someone in a similar relationship.

Make Sure Love is Real
Interracial relationships will not survive long-term if they are based on singular fascination with race or sex. In some circumstances, one party may have to give up everything to be with the other person. If you want a loving long-lasting relationship keep the same standards you would for a same-race relationship.  Standards to start, make sure your potential partner have good character, integrity, honesty, loyalty and a good personality.

In a mixed union you must be very comfortable in your own skin, not care what others say or think, and be bold enough to love differently.  Strong relationships endure and are sustained based on respect, honestly, love and a commitment to make it work through thick and thin.  


Love Reconciled is a YouTube Channel hosted by Char and Shar an interracial couple married over 27 years.  They share their journey of learning to live together in LOVE, WORK and PLAY.  They also share their debt free and minimalist lifestyle.  They share honest stories, testimonies and life experiences about the good, bad, victories and tribulations of their "happy imperfect" marriage throughout their journey.

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