Love Reconciled

Can you imagine working with your spouse in business?   Seems unlikely, right? 

My spouse and I made the decision to work together on May 8, 2000.  It was the best and worst day of our lives.  It was the best, because it allowed me (Char) to stay home and take care of our then two-year-old daughter.  It was the worst, because my wife (Shar) and I would now be working together full-time and boy are we different.

Shar is a good business minded person, but has a very demanding personality.  She is strong-willed, head-strong and we live on two very different schedules.  I wake up super early and Shar wakes up super late.  I, (Char), am also strong-willed, head-strong and love a strict routine, schedule and live by that rule.  Nevertheless, our first business was a licensed in-home daycare center, which was perfect because our daughter was able to have friends over daily.

Have a Strong Relationship
Being in business with your spouse can make or break the relationship, so make sure your relationship is firmly planted, stable and strong.  While most full-time working couples complain about not having enough quality time together, couples that are in business full-time tend to have too much time together.  Unfortunately, that can sometimes lead to tension, annoyances and regular disagreements with couples over minor things.  I'm not lying, about once a month Shar wants to leave me or our business, because she feels it's hard working with me.

Simple Suggestions to Improve Your Married-Business Relationship.

• Realize that both of you come with a set of unique strengths and weaknesses.  Appreciate and respect what the other brings to the business and relationship. 
• Focus on your united vision and goals and allow those goals to direct your business day.
• Learn to laugh more and not take life too seriously. 
• Try to keep your business and personal life separate, which can be difficult to do.  Use a timer to start and end your workday.  Once your workday ends, try to talk about other subjects other than work.
• Talk at the beginning of the day to discuss what projects each of you are working on.
• Debrief at the end of the day to discuss what was accomplished that day.
• Both of you sometimes will have to agree that some discussions are a no-win and agree to disagree. 
• Seek to understand and not always to be understood, because it’s not important to control everything, always be right and have the last word.
• Discuss and write down expectations and make sure the expectations are clear and realistic.
• When you get irritated with one another, pray together.  Then reflect on the blessings you have. Blessing are working in your pajamas, making money from home, not having to commute in horrible traffic and spending quality time with your spouse and loved ones.
• If one partner talks loud on the phone or must listen to music, make sure both have their own office or space to work away from each other. 
• Take breaks during the day.  Play ping pong, go for a walk, play a board game, go shopping, or have some intimacy time. 
• Divide your roles, responsibilities and projects based on each person’s expertise, strengths and weaknesses.  Allow each person to operate in the areas they are strong and in the areas they enjoy.
• Talk about everything.  Communicate openly and honestly about your frustrations, fears, anxiety, successes and hopes. 
• Be there for each other as partners, comrades and allies.

After 20 years of working together it can still be challenging.  However, having our home-based business has been the biggest blessing in our lives.  Its given us a debt-free life and we’ve been able to create the lifestyle we envisioned for ourselves, not the lifestyle someone dictated to us.  Now, we are working towards our united goal and journey of retiring early together with multiple streams of income.

If you and your spouse have thought about working together, do it.  Yes, it can bring both joy and pain, but it is so worth it.  If we had to do it over again, we definitely would choose to be in business and work together again.

Love Reconciled is a YouTube Channel hosted by Char and Shar an interracial couple married over 27 years.  They share their journey of learning to live together in LOVE, WORK and PLAY.  They also share their debt free and minimalist lifestyle.  They share honest stories, testimonies and life experiences about the good, bad, victories and tribulations of their "happy imperfect" marriage throughout their journey.

Patient, love is kind, long suffering and does not demand its own way.

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